<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?><rss version="2.0" xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/" xmlns:thr="http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0" xmlns:activity="http://activitystrea.ms/spec/1.0/" xmlns:media="http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/" xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/"><channel><title>Newsvine</title><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/</link><description>&quot;...an unrepentant bastard to friend and foe alike.&quot; - Brian Ford </description><language>en-us</language><copyright>Copyright 2013</copyright><lastBuildDate>Tue, 24 May 2011 05:22:31 +0000</lastBuildDate><pubDate>Thu, 20 Jun 2013 09:49:20 +0000</pubDate><generator>http://www.newsvine.com</generator><docs>http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss</docs><item><title>Huckabee, Trump, Daniels Give Up Presidential Aspirations Upon Dr. Frank Fennel Announcement</title>
<description><![CDATA[
excerpts from speech at RCPAC rally in Podunk, NC:
"I am, after all, the only candidate overtly endorsed by Jesus Christ Himself. I can understand their fear. Still, they could have at least given me a run for my money", said Dr.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2011/05/24/6705197-huckabee-trump-daniels-give-up-presidential-aspirations-upon-dr-frank-fennel-announcement</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2011/05/24/6705197-huckabee-trump-daniels-give-up-presidential-aspirations-upon-dr-frank-fennel-announcement</guid><category>politics</category><category>2012</category><category>mitt-romney</category><category>donald-trump</category><category>obama</category><category>republican</category><category>democrat</category><category>newt-gingrich</category><category>rubber-chicken</category><category>tea-party</category><category>frank-fennel</category><pubDate>Tue, 24 May 2011 05:22:32 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Ffawnshore2F6705191.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="300" width="400" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Ffawnshore2F6705191.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="90" /><media:description type="plain"></media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Ffawnshore2F6705233.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="300" width="400" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Ffawnshore2F6705233.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="90" /><media:description type="plain"></media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content></item><item><title>BREAKING NEWS: Dr. Frank Fennel to run for President.</title>
<description><![CDATA[
"If we are all still alive after May 22nd, I'll take it as a sign from Jesus that America needs me now".
Dr.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2011/05/17/6657907-breaking-news-dr-frank-fennel-to-run-for-president</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2011/05/17/6657907-breaking-news-dr-frank-fennel-to-run-for-president</guid><category>campaign</category><category>politics</category><category>president</category><category>gingrich</category><category>obama</category><category>romney</category><category>republican</category><category>democrat</category><category>libertarian</category><category>conservative</category><category>rubber-chicken</category><category>ron-paul</category><category>tea-party</category><category>dr-frank-fennel</category><pubDate>Tue, 17 May 2011 06:25:01 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Ffawnshore2F6657962.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="300" width="400" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Ffawnshore2F6657962.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="90" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;Dr. Frank Fennel&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content></item><item><title>EXCLUSIVE: Dr. Frank Fennel: &quot;I will not run for POTUS in 2012 unless my country needs me.&quot;</title>
<description><![CDATA[ Today, Frank Fennel's RCPAC released a statement claiming that the good Doctor has "absolutely no plans to run for office" in 2012, adding "unless my country needs me".]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2011/04/21/6507360-exclusive-dr-frank-fennel-i-will-not-run-for-potus-in-2012-unless-my-country-needs-me</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2011/04/21/6507360-exclusive-dr-frank-fennel-i-will-not-run-for-potus-in-2012-unless-my-country-needs-me</guid><category>trump</category><category>politics</category><category>gop</category><category>democrat</category><category>libertarian</category><category>rubber-chicken</category><category>palin</category><category>tea-party</category><category>dr-frank-fennel</category><category>frank-fennel</category><category>bachmann</category><category>rcpac</category><pubDate>Thu, 21 Apr 2011 15:14:57 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type></item><item><title>Is a Viable Third Party Possible or is America Fucked?</title>
<description><![CDATA[If we've learned anything about American politics in the 'Aughts it's this: choosing between the Democrats and the Republicans is like choosing between having ones scrotum mauled by a cougar or having ones scrotum mauled by a puma. There is a huge anti-incumbent movement brewing.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2010/01/10/3736376-is-a-viable-third-party-possible-or-is-america-fucked</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2010/01/10/3736376-is-a-viable-third-party-possible-or-is-america-fucked</guid><category>politics</category><category>republican</category><category>democrat</category><category>impotence</category><category>independent</category><category>rage</category><category>corporatism</category><category>dog-and-pony-show</category><category>yokels</category><category>teabaggers</category><pubDate>Sun, 10 Jan 2010 10:15:38 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Ffawnshore2F3736405.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="439" width="320" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Ffawnshore2F3736405.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="165" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;Here's a thought..&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content></item><item><title>The 10th Funny Day of Christmas:  Oh, what to do with those Newsvine earnings.</title>
<description><![CDATA[ I've been a member of Newswine since February of 2006. Each month for nearly four years, I've earned money for participating in and contributing to the Newsvine community.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[lauhal]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[lauhal]]></source><link>http://lauhal63.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/22/3663492-the-10th-funny-day-of-christmas-oh-what-to-do-with-those-newsvine-earnings</link><guid>http://lauhal63.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/22/3663492-the-10th-funny-day-of-christmas-oh-what-to-do-with-those-newsvine-earnings</guid><category>money</category><category>earnings</category><category>odd-news</category><category>newsvine</category><category>christmas</category><category>gifts</category><category>treasures</category><category>giving-back</category><category>funny-days-of-christmas</category><category>good-american</category><category>being-supportive</category><category>tfd09</category><pubDate>Tue, 22 Dec 2009 20:58:12 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2FLAUHAL632F3663516.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="80" width="48" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2FLAUHAL632F3663516.jpg&amp;width=120" width="48" height="80" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;It's sterling silver, people!&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2FLAUHAL632F3663555.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="85" width="58" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2FLAUHAL632F3663555.jpg&amp;width=120" width="58" height="85" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;Make out with me.  Please.&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2FLAUHAL632F3663587.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="90" width="67" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2FLAUHAL632F3663587.jpg&amp;width=120" width="67" height="90" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;He's the reasoning for the seasoning.&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2FLAUHAL632F3663608.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="125" width="155" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2FLAUHAL632F3663608.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="97" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;Number one on my wish list.&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2FLAUHAL632F3663647.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="464" width="400" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2FLAUHAL632F3663647.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="139" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;Now my baby has some company!&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content></item><item><title>9 Ladies Dancing: The 9th Funny Day of Christmas</title>
<description><![CDATA[On the 9th day of Christmas my true love gave to me

9 ladies dancing...]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[rwarner]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[rwarner]]></source><link>http://warners.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/21/3657766-9-ladies-dancing-the-9th-funny-day-of-christmas</link><guid>http://warners.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/21/3657766-9-ladies-dancing-the-9th-funny-day-of-christmas</guid><category>naked</category><category>women</category><category>dancing</category><category>sex</category><category>holiday</category><category>greece</category><category>u-s</category><category>love</category><category>christmas</category><category>men</category><category>cannibalism</category><category>gifts</category><category>orgy</category><category>sacrifice</category><category>nudity</category><category>pox</category><category>trickery</category><category>necrosis</category><category>pus</category><category>merriment</category><category>12-funny-days-of-christmas</category><category>lenaea</category><category>rotten-bits</category><category>maenads</category><category>serial-killing-true-love</category><category>sacrificial-penis</category><category>tfd09</category><pubDate>Mon, 21 Dec 2009 16:25:35 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fwarners2F3658275.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="400" width="269" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fwarners2F3658275.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="178" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;Maenads are hot but they'll eat your nads.&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fwarners2F3658287.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="500" width="375" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fwarners2F3658287.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="160" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;They may look enticing but...&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content></item><item><title>Poll: Is Jesus the Reason for the Season?</title>
<description><![CDATA[I'm conflicted. What do YOU think?]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/21/3656188-poll-is-jesus-the-reason-for-the-season</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/21/3656188-poll-is-jesus-the-reason-for-the-season</guid><category>church</category><category>holiday</category><category>jesus-christ</category><category>christmas</category><category>world-news</category><category>jesus</category><category>christian</category><category>xmas</category><category>manger</category><category>baby-jesus</category><category>nativity</category><category>bethlehem</category><category>christianity</category><category>christ</category><category>lord</category><category>holiday-season</category><category>8-and-a-half</category><pubDate>Mon, 21 Dec 2009 05:54:15 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Ffawnshore2F3656204.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="274" width="267" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Ffawnshore2F3656204.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="123" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;Is Jesus the Reason?&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content></item><item><title>WTF, Santa?  (The Eighth Funny Day of Christmas)</title>
<description><![CDATA[Witticisms escape me and writer's block fully contains me, but I will muddle through in accordance with Drollhouse law!  I toyed with the ideas of stories of cunnilinguists spreading joy all over the world one perfect orgasm at a time.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[vicaxp]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[vicaxp]]></source><link>http://vicaxp.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/20/3652138-wtf-santa-the-eighth-funny-day-of-christmas</link><guid>http://vicaxp.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/20/3652138-wtf-santa-the-eighth-funny-day-of-christmas</guid><category>odd-news</category><category>shit</category><category>wtf</category><category>the-12-funny-days-of-xmas</category><category>drollhouse-rocks</category><category>fabloota</category><category>christmas-cheer-gimme-a-beer</category><category>tfd09</category><pubDate>Sun, 20 Dec 2009 13:32:06 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fvicaxp2F3652149.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="267" width="400" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fvicaxp2F3652149.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="80" /><media:description type="plain"></media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fvicaxp2F3652154.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="261" width="400" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fvicaxp2F3652154.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="79" /><media:description type="plain"></media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fvicaxp2F3652155.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="240" width="240" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fvicaxp2F3652155.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="120" /><media:description type="plain"></media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content></item><item><title>A Traditional Christmas Tradition (The Seventh Funny Day Of Christmas)</title>
<description><![CDATA[So it used to be that every year I published a Christmas Booze Advisory and then the opportunity came up to write for the Funny Days of Christmas series and I thought I could knock out an article much in the same style as last year.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[David Mc Girr]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[David Mc Girr]]></source><link>http://davidmcgirr.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/19/3652280-a-traditional-christmas-tradition-the-seventh-funny-day-of-christmas</link><guid>http://davidmcgirr.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/19/3652280-a-traditional-christmas-tradition-the-seventh-funny-day-of-christmas</guid><category>entertainment</category><category>suicide</category><category>santa-claus</category><category>christmas</category><category>santa</category><category>asshat</category><category>troll</category><category>twelve-days</category><category>christmas-lights</category><category>the-twelve-funny-days-of-christmas</category><category>mistletoe</category><category>its-satire</category><category>calm-down</category><category>12-funny-days-of-christmas</category><category>twelve-days-of-christmas</category><category>jesus-was-induced</category><category>uncle-jerry</category><category>tfd09</category><pubDate>Sat, 19 Dec 2009 20:50:41 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fdavidmcgirr2F3652480.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="302" width="400" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fdavidmcgirr2F3652480.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="91" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;Now you're talking&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content></item><item><title>Rudolph: the True Story Behind the Social Outcast of the Reindeer. (The Sixth Funny Day of Christmas)</title>
<description><![CDATA[
In actuality, Rudolph was indeed ridiculed and persecuted for his red nose, and then he led the sleigh through the fog one night and saved Christmas, and then he was summarily assassinated by Blitzen, with the support of most of the other reindeer.
 
Rudolph was not part of the &nbsp;&hellip;]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[LaeF1]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[LaeF1]]></source><link>http://laef.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/18/3649814-rudolph-the-true-story-behind-the-social-outcast-of-the-reindeer-the-sixth-funny-day-of-christmas</link><guid>http://laef.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/18/3649814-rudolph-the-true-story-behind-the-social-outcast-of-the-reindeer-the-sixth-funny-day-of-christmas</guid><category>violence</category><category>rudolph</category><category>beer</category><category>explosions</category><category>martin-luther-king-jr</category><category>john-lennon</category><category>che-guevara</category><category>christmas</category><category>world-news</category><category>holidays</category><category>reindeer</category><category>fireworks</category><category>santa</category><category>action</category><category>consumerism</category><category>gandhi</category><category>boobies</category><category>north-pole</category><category>butts</category><category>howard-zinn</category><category>cupid</category><category>flatulence</category><category>fred-hampton</category><category>12-funny-days-of-christmas</category><category>pole-riding</category><category>look-myk-a-poll</category><category>reindeer-vagina</category><category>ryan-meehan-must-die</category><category>everone-saw-laefs-butt</category><category>tfd09</category><pubDate>Fri, 18 Dec 2009 23:18:34 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Flaef2F3650134.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="300" width="400" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Flaef2F3650134.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="90" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;don't cry for me.&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content></item><item><title>Santa Thinks You're A Douche. (the Fifth Funny Day of Christmas)</title>
<description><![CDATA[Ho ho ho!Come here and sit on Santa's lap, little one. My, how big you have gotten! Ho ho! Tell Santa what you want for Christmas. Oh, ho ho! What's that? You want a _________? Ho ho ho!Well, little one, Santa can't do that. Don't be sad (ho.).]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/17/3644466-santa-thinks-youre-a-douche-the-fifth-funny-day-of-christmas</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/17/3644466-santa-thinks-youre-a-douche-the-fifth-funny-day-of-christmas</guid><category>santa-claus</category><category>christmas</category><category>world-news</category><category>santa</category><category>asshat</category><category>troll</category><category>brilliant</category><category>douche</category><category>douchebag</category><category>twelve-days</category><category>the-twelve-funny-days-of-christmas</category><category>douchebaggery</category><category>12-funny-days-of-christmas</category><category>twelve-days-of-christmas</category><category>jesus-was-induced</category><category>douchetard</category><category>walts-member</category><category>tfd09</category><pubDate>Thu, 17 Dec 2009 23:11:57 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Ffawnshore2F3647534.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="350" width="300" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Ffawnshore2F3647534.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="140" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;Ho ho ho!&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content></item><item><title>Poll: Do You Like Christmas? (Fourth Funny Day of Christmas)</title>
<description><![CDATA[ Well? Do you?
]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Mykola Bilokonsky]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Mykola Bilokonsky]]></source><link>http://darkside.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/15/3637669-poll-do-you-like-christmas-fourth-funny-day-of-christmas</link><guid>http://darkside.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/15/3637669-poll-do-you-like-christmas-fourth-funny-day-of-christmas</guid><category>world-news</category><category>catch-me-if-you-can</category><category>the-12-funny-days-of-christmas</category><category>the-12-days-of-christmas</category><category>hey-thats-not-funny</category><category>mykola-bilokonsky-cannot-write</category><category>we-should-pity-poor-mykola</category><category>someone-has-access-to-myks-tags</category><category>myk-thought-only-he-knew-that-trick</category><category>happy-genitalia</category><category>lame-ass</category><category>so-lame-it-hurts</category><category>f-for-effort</category><category>neener</category><category>tfd09</category><pubDate>Tue, 15 Dec 2009 22:15:06 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type></item><item><title>Obama's War on Christmas Hits the Federal Budget: The Second Funny Day of Christmas</title>
<description><![CDATA[ WASHINGTON - The "War on Christmas", has been brewing for a few years now, and it seems like President Obama has finally chosen sides and put our money where his mouth is.

 Some back-story: ]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Brad Leclerc]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Brad Leclerc]]></source><link>http://brad-leclerc.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/14/3632897-obamas-war-on-christmas-hits-the-federal-budget-the-second-funny-day-of-christmas</link><guid>http://brad-leclerc.newsvine.com/_news/2009/12/14/3632897-obamas-war-on-christmas-hits-the-federal-budget-the-second-funny-day-of-christmas</guid><category>holiday</category><category>odd-news</category><category>newsvine</category><category>obama</category><category>christmas</category><category>meta</category><category>tag-abuse</category><category>war-on-christmas</category><category>twelve</category><category>not-satire</category><category>not-funny</category><category>droll</category><category>the-twelve-funny-days-of-christmas</category><category>the-12-funny-days-of-christmas</category><category>12-days</category><category>msnbcvine</category><category>so-friggin-boring</category><category>stupid-n00bs-will-be-confused</category><category>war-on-xmas</category><category>cleaveland-steamer</category><category>tfd09</category><pubDate>Tue, 15 Dec 2009 02:18:24 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2FBrad-Leclerc2F3633504.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="580" width="400" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2FBrad-Leclerc2F3633504.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="174" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;O'Reilly is Ready for war. Are you?&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content></item><item><title>Drollhouse Avengers Assemble and Form Voltron! Find the 5th Beatle and Save Christmas!</title>
<description><![CDATA[Yep.It's time for a Drollhouse Christmas Redux! The following members will now step forward and assume the position:vasNoah BradleyAnsabrwarnerCashMykola BilokonskyM.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/11/19/3517918-drollhouse-avengers-assemble-and-form-voltron-find-the-5th-beatle-and-save-christmas</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/11/19/3517918-drollhouse-avengers-assemble-and-form-voltron-find-the-5th-beatle-and-save-christmas</guid><category>humor</category><category>arts</category><category>prank</category><category>dead-horse</category><category>fennel-boy</category><category>drollhouse</category><category>the-twelve-funny-days-of-christmas</category><category>the-12-funny-days-of-christmas</category><pubDate>Thu, 19 Nov 2009 04:51:47 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type></item><item><title>Russian cannibal who ate his mother given lighter sentence by judge who says 'he was starving, he needed to eat' | Mail Online</title>
<description><![CDATA[A cannibal who killed and ate parts of his mother had his sentence reduced by a judge who said 'he needed to eat'.

Sergey Gavrilov secured reduced time in jail after confessing: 'I did not like the meat very much. It was too fatty. But I was so hungry, I had to eat it.']]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/11/12/3493367-russian-cannibal-who-ate-his-mother-given-lighter-sentence-by-judge-who-says-he-was-starving-he-needed-to-eat-mail-online</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/11/12/3493367-russian-cannibal-who-ate-his-mother-given-lighter-sentence-by-judge-who-says-he-was-starving-he-needed-to-eat-mail-online</guid><category>russia</category><category>yum</category><category>vodka</category><category>gambling</category><category>world-news</category><category>cannibal</category><category>mommy</category><pubDate>Thu, 12 Nov 2009 14:23:04 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/bookmark</activity:object-type></item><item><title>Define America and Her Purpose in the 21st Century and I'll Give You a Prize</title>
<description><![CDATA[ I'll give you a cookie.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/11/12/3492583-define-america-and-her-purpose-in-the-21st-century-and-ill-give-you-a-prize</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/11/12/3492583-define-america-and-her-purpose-in-the-21st-century-and-ill-give-you-a-prize</guid><category>america</category><category>politics</category><category>2012</category><category>u-s</category><category>united-states</category><category>liberal</category><category>republican</category><category>democrat</category><category>conservative</category><category>2009</category><pubDate>Thu, 12 Nov 2009 08:03:44 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type></item><item><title>500 turn out for $30-per-bottle beer </title>
<description><![CDATA[A California microbrewery owner said more than 500 people turned out to buy $30 bottles of his barrel-aged beer at the Great Depression-themed release party.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/10/28/3437633-500-turn-out-for-30-per-bottle-beer</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/10/28/3437633-500-turn-out-for-30-per-bottle-beer</guid><category>money</category><category>california</category><category>odd-news</category><category>beer</category><category>party</category><category>microbrewery</category><pubDate>Thu, 29 Oct 2009 01:54:34 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/bookmark</activity:object-type></item><item><title>Who Would Jesus Waterboard (besides Judas)?</title>
<description><![CDATA[Why is it that ultra-conservatives, most of whom claim to embrace Christian values, are the first to chuck their morality once it becomes inconvenient?How do they reconcile this with their Faith? Is it "do unto others and turn the other cheek" unless the others are "filthy Arab t&nbsp;&hellip;]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/04/26/2735232-who-would-jesus-waterboard-besides-judas</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/04/26/2735232-who-would-jesus-waterboard-besides-judas</guid><category>terrorism</category><category>politics</category><category>torture</category><category>jesus</category><category>christian</category><category>christianity</category><category>waterboarding</category><pubDate>Sun, 26 Apr 2009 19:51:04 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type></item><item><title>Grassroots Movement: Conservatives Host &quot;Dirty Sanchez&quot; Events on April 15th</title>
<description><![CDATA["It's right under our noses!", says a trucker in Tennessee.
"We want to expose the liberal taint", cries one Orange County suburban hausfrau.Across America, spurred on by right-wing luminaries like Glenn Beck and Sean Hannity, the air is filled with the sweet fragrance of politic&nbsp;&hellip;]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/04/14/2681490-grassroots-movement-conservatives-host-dirty-sanchez-events-on-april-15th</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2009/04/14/2681490-grassroots-movement-conservatives-host-dirty-sanchez-events-on-april-15th</guid><category>america</category><category>politics</category><category>tea</category><category>feces</category><category>fox-news</category><category>republican</category><category>satire</category><category>poo</category><category>rush-limbaugh</category><category>conservative</category><category>glenn-beck</category><category>beck</category><category>sean-hannity</category><category>boston-tea-party</category><category>tea-bag</category><category>teabag</category><category>dirty-sanchez</category><pubDate>Tue, 14 Apr 2009 05:46:56 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type></item><item><title>A Joyous Announcement:  A Newsvine Birth</title>
<description><![CDATA[It is my privilege and honor to announce the birth of Sagan, our first official Newsvine baby.

Sagan was born at 12:15 a.m. on January 12, 2009, weighing 6 pounds and 14 ounces, 20 inches long to proud parents and Newsviners WaltD and RWarner.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Viki Babbles Gonia]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Viki Babbles Gonia]]></source><link>http://vikibabbles.newsvine.com/_news/2009/01/19/2327618-a-joyous-announcement-a-newsvine-birth</link><guid>http://vikibabbles.newsvine.com/_news/2009/01/19/2327618-a-joyous-announcement-a-newsvine-birth</guid><category>baby</category><category>newsvine</category><category>sagan</category><category>waltd</category><category>rwarner</category><category>birth-announcement</category><pubDate>Mon, 19 Jan 2009 14:32:16 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/generic_post</activity:object-type><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fvikibabbles2F2328880.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="300" width="400" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fvikibabbles2F2328880.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="90" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;Sagan is here!&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content><media:content url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fvikibabbles2F2328881.jpg&amp;width=400" type="image/jpeg" medium="image" height="166" width="221" ><media:thumbnail url="http://m.static.newsvine.com/servista/imagesizer?file=http3A2F2Fwww.newsvine.com2F_vine2Fimages2Fusers2Fvikibabbles2F2328881.jpg&amp;width=120" width="120" height="91" /><media:description type="plain">&lt;p&gt;Sleepy Sagan.&lt;/p&gt;</media:description><media:credit role="owner" scheme="urn:yvs"></media:credit></media:content></item><item><title>Author Michael Crichton Has 'Died Unexpectedly'</title>
<description><![CDATA[Perhaps best known for being the author of Jurassic Park and its sequel The Lost World, which were turned into a hugely successful movie franchise, his numerous books have sold over 150 million copies worldwide.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2008/11/05/2076281-author-michael-crichton-has-died-unexpectedly</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2008/11/05/2076281-author-michael-crichton-has-died-unexpectedly</guid><category>literature</category><category>world-news</category><category>obituary</category><category>michael-chrighton</category><pubDate>Wed, 5 Nov 2008 18:12:13 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/bookmark</activity:object-type></item><item><title>Woman walks through market holding severed head of man who tried to rape her</title>
<description><![CDATA[Crowds in a busy market fled in terror as a woman walked among them holding aloft the severed head of a man who had attacked her.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2008/10/18/2014330-woman-walks-through-market-holding-severed-head-of-man-who-tried-to-rape-her</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2008/10/18/2014330-woman-walks-through-market-holding-severed-head-of-man-who-tried-to-rape-her</guid><category>india</category><category>violence</category><category>beheading</category><category>crime</category><category>rape</category><category>world-news</category><category>retribution</category><category>one-tough-chick</category><pubDate>Sat, 18 Oct 2008 17:31:34 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/bookmark</activity:object-type></item><item><title>Watermelon-eating dog prompts stabbing</title>
<description><![CDATA[BOSTON, Oct. 2 (UPI) -- A dog eating a watermelon helped cause a Boston man to repeatedly stab himself to prove to his brother he wasn't afraid of pain, police say.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2008/10/02/1948149-watermelon-eating-dog-prompts-stabbing</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2008/10/02/1948149-watermelon-eating-dog-prompts-stabbing</guid><category>boston</category><category>dog</category><category>stabbing</category><category>crime</category><category>us-news</category><category>watermelon</category><category>brotherly-love</category><pubDate>Thu, 2 Oct 2008 22:51:00 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/bookmark</activity:object-type></item><item><title> Pink Floyd founder Wright dies at 65 </title>
<description><![CDATA[Pink Floyd keyboard player and founder member Richard Wright has died aged 65 from cancer.

Wright appeared on the group's first album, The Piper at the Gates of Dawn, in 1967 alongside lead guitarist Syd Barrett, Roger Waters and Nick Mason.]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2008/09/15/1869469-pink-floyd-founder-wright-dies-at-65</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2008/09/15/1869469-pink-floyd-founder-wright-dies-at-65</guid><category>entertainment</category><category>music</category><category>animals</category><category>rock</category><category>obituary</category><category>the-wall</category><category>pink-floyd</category><category>dark-side-of-the-moon</category><category>richard-wright</category><pubDate>Mon, 15 Sep 2008 18:22:55 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/bookmark</activity:object-type></item><item><title>Burglar victims wake to spice rub, sausage attack</title>
<description><![CDATA[
A burglar who broke into a home just east of Fresno rubbed spices over the body of one of two men as they slept in their rooms and then used an 8-inch sausage to whack the other man on the face and head before running out of the house, Fresno County sheriff's deputies said Satu&nbsp;&hellip;]]></description>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[Walt D]]></dc:creator><source><![CDATA[Walt D]]></source><link>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2008/09/08/1842187-burglar-victims-wake-to-spice-rub-sausage-attack</link><guid>http://fawnshore.newsvine.com/_news/2008/09/08/1842187-burglar-victims-wake-to-spice-rub-sausage-attack</guid><category>california</category><category>burglary</category><category>odd-news</category><category>crime</category><category>fresno</category><category>us-news</category><category>weird</category><category>sausage</category><category>weird-news</category><category>culinary-arts</category><pubDate>Mon, 8 Sep 2008 21:10:39 +0000</pubDate><activity:verb>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/post</activity:verb><activity:object-type>http://activitystrea.ms/schema/1.0/bookmark</activity:object-type></item></channel></rss>