"If we are all still alive after May 22nd, I'll take it as a sign from Jesus that America needs me now".
Dr. Frank was in a rare meditative state when our reporters caught up with him at RCPAC headquarters, "I am deeply spiritual and I'll leave it up to God Himself whether or not I should run..if He doesn't bring the Faithful up to the Heavens on a fiery pink cloud, I'll take it as a sign that I should be the next President of the United States. The ball's in your court, God!"
"Mike Huckabee can take orders from Jesus, so why shouldn't I?", explained Dr. Frank.
"Mitt Romney is an obvious commie who references horrific music. Gringrich is a philandering two-faced douchebag. Ron Paul wants to give free heroin to toddlers. So it's really down to me and Obama."
Frank pauses, as if to savor this fated moment,
"I'm a rubber chicken you can believe in".